The Expendables 2

Suiting you up for another summer of Action Movie Fantasy Camp, here is the extended trailer for The Expendables 2—or, as Tony Bennett Sylvester Stallone calls it in his introduction, "Expendable 2," an abbreviation that marks the absolute last excess-free moment in this trailer. As Stallone goes on to mumble, the new Expendables is more of the same, only more: more refurbished action stars like Chuck Norris and Jean-Claude Van Damme, more Bruce Willis and Arnold Schwarzenegger (and more "Hey, I am Arnold Schwarzenegger!" catchphrase-spewing), more Liam Hemsworth for the Hunger Gamers, more weapons-related puns, more frown-walking in slow motion, more zip-lined plots designed to ferry you between explosions as expediently as possible—more everything, in other words, that made the first one a lot of fun, despite or perhaps even because of its knowing artificiality. That's definitely something to ponder if you're a sissy and want to get shot in the face for standing around ponderin' things.