The Last Stand 

Arnold Schwarzenegger may have edged his way back into acting via Sylvester Stallone projects with high concepts requiring lots of detailed explanation, but for his first solo starring role since 2003, he's keeping it simple. The Last Stand is just your everyday story of an average small town watched over by your average 65-year-old Austrian bodybuilder sheriff—one who is, by Schwarzenegger's typically candid admission, "old," and facing the universal inevitability of his own looming obsolescence hurtling down on him like a metaphorical armored super-car. Also hurtling down on him: A literal armored super-car, driven by a drug cartel leader who's intent on crossing the Mexican border at any cost—and as Arnold Schwarzenegger himself can tell you, crossing the Mexican border can have serious consequences. (Hello, this is us, The A.V. Club, telling you a joke about Arnold Schwarzenegger sleeping with his Mexican maid. This is a joke because "crossing the Mexican border" means two things.) Co-starring Forest Whitaker as Deputy Agent Guy and Johnny Knoxville as Crazy Hat.