The Smashing Pumpkins just issued an internet-wide Craigslist ad for a new guitarist

Today, in “Exciting opportunities to potentially get to pet Billy Corgan’s cats” news: The Smashing Pumpkins has put out an internet-wide equivalent of one of those telephone pole listings with the little “Tear me off and then find me in your pocket six weeks later” tabs on them, issuing an open call for a new guitarist.

The band (currently made up of Corgan and fellow non-D’arcy Wretzky founding members James Iha and Jimmy Chamberlin) issued this planetary Craigslist ad in the aftermath of the departure of guitarist Jeff Schroeder, who originally joined the group as a second guitar player during a reunion tour in 2007. Per Variety, Schroeder dipped out on the job back in October, after a mere 16 years in post-2000 Smashing Pumpkins, which is the kind of life path that will mess with you if you think about it for too long.

Anyway, the band is now looking for a new guitarist to join the group, and, we’re guessing, kick in a double share of gas money on road trips; the band issued the call on Instagram, with a posting that appears to have been done in MS Paint, asking applicants to submit a resumé and related materials to an email address that almost certainly now contains more copies of the opening riff from “Tonight, Tonight” than any other inbox in human history.

Despite our little jabs and jokes (and the occasional break-up or decades-long bandmate drama), Smashing Pumpkins are still pretty dang successful; they recently released Atum: A Rock Opera In Three Acts, which was Schroeder’s final work with the band, and tour regularly to well-attended shows. (Just last year, they launched the World Is A Vampire Festival, which merged together the band and some of their most beloved contemporaries—including Stone Temple Pilots—with Corgan’s long-time obsession with promoting professional wrestling.) And that can be your life now, reader! Just get your best spider-themed shirts and guitar licks ready. Watch out for bodyslams.